Writing a blog causes me to be very aware of articles and ideas that might be a good blog topic. I want to be sure I have good sources so I won’t be wrong. Is my blog going to be good enough to justify peoples’ time? I would hate to miss out on a really good topic opportunity. What if I become a victim of someone stealing my idea?
The Harvard Business Review article “Don’t Let Your Inner Fears Limit Your Career” …
… lists those four fears (bold in the above paragraph) as normal and common. The article is written by Matt Brubaker and Foster Mobley.
The truth is that fear is normal. How you deal with your fear is the key difference. Fear of being wrong can push you to check your facts, as a healthy response, or display analysis paralysis as the downside. I recall when I had the fear of not being good enough, which was really about not feeling lovable (yes, check my childhood). This fear makes it harder to be authentic. Fear of missing out can cause you to be attracted to too many meetings. The fear of being victimized breaks down trust.
The HBR article suggests getting help from a friend, counselor or coach. When I was in my 40’s, I did several years of “whitewater counseling” to learn how to name my emotions, understand them, and manage my response behaviors. It was time well spent. If you are ever in doubt, I would recommend getting help and doing multiple sessions before giving up. The fifth session was the breakthrough for me.
Courage is not letting fear stop you from your higher goal.
Brubaker and Mobley recommend owning your fear rather than suppressing it. Their three recommended steps are:
- Acknowledge the fear. Be willing to look at what is real and what is from one’s past, or unrealistic.
- Interrogate the fear to better understand the source. Often the fear is based on historical experiences that may, or may not, apply today. Journaling works well for me and many others.
- Choose a different course of action, and take action. Find a better direction and move toward it.
Many people do not realize that fear is warping what they do and say. Being aware is the first step. Understand the fear, and the impact. Decide what you want to do about it.